Feeling Alone

Have you ever felt alone? Like really really alone? Where you thought that the people who were supposed to be there for you did not show up when you needed them and their support the most? Where people who you were once close too moved on into a new season of their life, and it seemed as if they forgot about you and all that you have done for them? How about going from a life of socialization to now a life of isolation? If your answer to these questions are yes, then you are right where you need to be.

Can I share that I have been so overwhelmed in this season of my life because of all of the changes that has happened? I have lost close friendships. Not because the friendships were unhealthy but because people moved on, not really making an effort to maintain the relationship. I have felt so alone on the job because of the transition from being fully in person to now fully remote, and also, still not having any close connections with any of my coworkers after being at the job for a little over a year now. I am super close to my sisters, and I had lived with my older sister when we moved to CT last year. However, because she received a position further from where we are living over a month ago, she ended up moving out of our apartment leaving me by myself in a place where she was my only family and friend.

I have never experienced this kind of a shift in my life where I was completely by myself in the physical sense. When I lived in NY, I always had someone to talk too. On the job of 7 years, during my college days, at church, and in my home. I was surrounded by people whom I loved and enjoyed being around 24/7. I looked forward to going to work, school, church, and being at home because it was never a dull day. When I was going through something, there was always somebody that I could turn too. Now? It is just me here. Alone. In an apartment. With not a soul to talk too.

I have never encountered a season like this, and it has been a challenge in every way. I had no one to talk too to help me process all of these overwhelming changes. In those moments where I felt sad, I had no other choice but to turn to God. God was always there for me throughout the years but to be honest, He was not always my first choice. I did not share everything with Him because I had friends and family around all of the time. I went to God when all else failed. All that I put my trust in was now completely gone. This season of isolation has been extremely difficult to adjust too, but in it, God has revealed His purpose for it.

I believe that when God strips away our close connections for a season and isolates us, it is for so many reasons.

1. It could be His way of moving you into the calling the He has placed over your life.
2. He wants you to learn how to invite Him into every area of your life, even the smallest, insignificant areas.
3. He wants to answer the questions that are on your heart but He wants to teach you how to be still enough to hear His voice without extraneous factors.
4. Maybe this time, God wants you to learn how to turn to Him and depend on Him fully to meet your every need first before going to people.
5. When Jesus was on Earth, he went away many times to be alone with his Heavenly Father. In those moments when it was just him and God, God revealed so much to him. God revealed his future to him, and what was to come. So maybe, just maybe, God is requiring more time for you to get away with Him so that He can show you and teach you some things that can only be done in the secret place. Maybe He just wants to reveal some things to you.
6. Maybe God wants to strip away things or even people in your life that are not needed anymore. Again, these things or people did not have to be bad or unhealthy for you. It/they will not serve a purpose anymore as you move into your destiny here on Earth. The things and the people that God wants to remove from your life cannot go where He wants to take you, and you have to be okay with that.
7. God wants you to heal. A season by yourself is not to torture you but to force you to look inwards and see the broken areas in your life so that you can heal.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and a bit down right now because you are feeling alone, be encouraged. You never imagined two, five, or ten years ago that you would be right where you are today. Where you would be by yourself with no close family and/or friends. Where you would be stuck at home all of the time. I had an entire vision of where I wanted to be at 25, and being in an apartment by myself where I do not have any family or friends close by was not part of the plan. Well at least my plan anyways. I am pretty sure whatever your situation is currently was never part of your plan as well. However, in a season like this, this is where we have to cling on to God like never before.

During this season. God was the one person who never failed me. He was with me every step of the way. When I was overwhelmed with the sudden changes in my life, He brought me so much comfort and unexplainable peace. I am realizing that this was all a part of God’s divine plan for my life, and I am learning to be okay with it. If you too are in this season like me where you went from being surrounded by friends and/or family to now suddenly having lost that closeness and it is just you, there is a reason. Everything that God does in your life is strategic. He is lining things up. He wants to blow your mind, but you have to be ready.

God is getting you ready if this is your season away from everything and everyone that you once depended on. The only reason God removes is because He wants to add. If you have lost friends for whatever reason, do not spend another day thinking about it. Whatever you lost, God promises that He will restore (Deuteronomy 30:3). Start thanking Him that new friends are on the way. If you are by yourself in your current living situation, be content. You get to do things at your own pace in your own time. You do not have to worry about anyone else but yourself. If you are on a job with no one to connect with, it is okay. God will bring the people. In the meantime, focus on acquiring and maintaining the necessary skills to be the best at your job. Spend time learning the culture and the climate of your job. If it is family, let God in, and allow Him to be that father, mother, sister, or brother that you never had. He is a father to the fatherless and a mother to the motherless (Psalm 27:10). He will stick closer than any brother [or sister] (Proverbs 18:24). Stuck at home? Utilize this time to practice some self-care and heal. Take a break from dating and socializing. Focus on you. God is just slowing you down so that you can see the bigger picture He has for your life.

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