How Do I Keep My Thoughts Pure While Being a Virgin?
Sex is literally everywhere. It is almost impossible to get away from it in our everyday lives. From billboards to advertisement on television, one would be lucky if they can go 24 hours without seeing, listening, hearing, or reading something pertaining to sex. So how do you keep your thoughts pure while abstaining from sex? The answer can be a lot of different things to many but for me, it is staying connected to God.
To be honest, I did try to fast from watching shows, reading books, and listening to music that contained any sexual content, even if it was as simple as a kiss but the fast did not last too long because sexual content was everywhere! I even looked for a scripture to meditate on when sexual thoughts would come but it wasn’t long before those thoughts overtook the Word of God.
This past year has taught me that one of the reasons as to why I did not have healthy interactions with a few guys in the past was because of my thoughts. I would think about sex a lot even though I was and am still a virgin. When I would interact with a guy, I would push limits to see how far I could go without actually going there because I wanted to act out physically what I was thinking mentally. You know the scripture, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he,” (Proverbs 23:7)? Whatever we think, we become. Whatever we think, we act upon. My thoughts started turning into actions. That had put me in dangerous situations and it was literally only God who has kept me.
I remember in the past that when a sexual thought would come, I would let it play out in my head and then I would repent. God knew in my heart that I really wanted to break free from this unhealthy habit because of the times when I cried before Him. I did not know how to break free. I believed that God had to allow something drastic to happen for me to realize that this habit will only get worse from here on out if I did not make the decision to truly change, God did not allow what happened earlier this year to destroy me but to show me that my thoughts can lead to serious consequences.
Sometimes, all it takes is that one situation to truly wake you up.
So what did I do to get me to where I am today where I can combat those unhealthy thoughts?
- 1. I allowed God in. He already knows what you and I will think way before we even think it. There was no need to continue hiding my sin to God. I confessed and stated that this was something that I truly struggle in and that I needed help in.
- 2. I began to take ownership. I couldn’t blame the guys which I did for a long time. I opened up the door. I took the first step and then the next. I had to own up to the fact that my thoughts put me in these dangerous situations.
- 3. Asking God to make those thoughts so bitter to me to the point where I won’t even have a desire to entertain it.
As of today, my thoughts have changed drastically. I am now 3 months “sober” and I am proud of myself. When those thoughts come, I immediately fight it by reflecting on how those thoughts got me in to trouble in the first place and by asking God to help me. It is a constant and daily battle but I do not fight it alone. During my strong moments, I stay prayed up so that when those weak moments come, I am ready for war.
I am not perfect. There has been a few moments where I slipped but the awesomeness of inviting God in is that He quickly helped me to my feet the second I called on His name,
You may not be like me where you are trying to break free from unclean thoughts, however, if you’ve read up until this point, you realized that maybe you want to break a habit that no one knows about but you, and you have been struggling with it for years. Take some of the pointers that I mentioned and watch God begin to work in your life so that you can be forever free!
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