Should I Be In A Relationship Right Now?
Should I be in a relationship right now? That is a question that you have to ask yourself. Whether you are currently in a relationship or single, you have to know if being in a relationship is the right move for you in this season of your life. The desire for companionship is real. The longing for that attention, that touch, that embrace is natural. I get it. I’ve been there where I wanted nothing more than to be in a relationship. I was tired of lonely and horny nights. I was tired of not having anyone to talk too. I was tired of going grocery shopping by myself and having to lift the heavy items from the shelf to the cart and then from the cart to the car. I was tired of watching wholesome shows/movies and then all of a sudden, an intimate scene comes on. I was tired of people sharing their relationship situation and I couldn’t relate. I was tired of seeing couples everywhere. I was tired of being the only single coworker, sibling, and friend. As difficult as it all was, I had to come to the harsh reality that I wasn’t ready for a relationship. I wasn’t ready for a relationship because of my “Why’s“. I couldn’t pour into something, let alone someone, if I haven’t poured into myself first.
When it is my time, I want to do relationships the right way. I want to be married only once. I want my husband to be my first and only boyfriend. I don’t want to date around in hopes of finding “the one”. For this to happen, I have to understand God’s way of dating and relationships. God designed relationships to edify, not deplete you. Relationships to build you up and not tear you down. Relationships that will compliment you, not complete you. Relationships that will encourage, not discourage you. Relationships that will make for a better you. I believe that the way you do relationships is a deep reflection on the health of your heart. A healthy heart displays Christ-like tendencies. That is a heart that communicates effectively; is quick to forgive; slow to anger; displays humility, respect, and patience; pours out compassion; mercy, and grace; is kind and loving; and does not have a harsh tongue. If you do not have this kind of a healthy heart, maybe it’s time to reassess and get your heart checked out. You do so by spending time with God. By building a relationship with Him and Him teaching you fullness in Christ alone. Relationships fail because 1) partners are looking to each for things that only God can give them like validation, approval, and acceptance; and 2)partners are trying to change each other and that cannot be done without a healthy heart healed by God. Putting that kind of pressure on your partner only leads to destruction.
We can be the generation that breaks the cycle of dysfunctional relationships but that can only happen if you start to become honest with yourself. If your reasons for being in a relationship or wanting one is similar to mines or because it makes you look good, then to answer the above question, No, you should not be in a relationship right now. You can be the one that breaks generational curses so that your future does not have to deal with what your past dealt with. Take a stand today and get your heart checked out!
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