Why God May Have You Single

Have you ever wondered why you are single? If you did, you discovered the correct blog post today. By now, you may have already heard my story. I never dated, never went on a date, and never had a boyfriend. I am the true definition of completely single. I have been single my entire life. The only relationships I have been in are the ones with my families and friends. I never understood why I was single. Was it my looks? My attitude? My personality? Was I not putting myself out there and making myself available? Were my accomplishments intimidating to guys and that’s why they never pursued? So many questions in my head. It wasn’t until I started spending quality time with God and humbly asking Him the WHY did I finally receive my answer.

Now, I am no expert in this area but based on my own experiences and what God has revealed to me this past year, I am just going to jump right into it and give you some reasons as to why God may have you single right now in this season of your life.

1.  To heal the broken areas of your life. Maybe there is childhood trauma that you have yet to heal from. Many of our childhood traumas stem from what mommy and/or daddy did or did not do for us as little girls or little boys. You need to explore that. God doesn’t want you to repeat those same mistakes. He wants to break the generational curses from your life. He wants to break the cycle and He wants to use you to do so. He is keeping you single so that your focus can be on healing to bring forth a generation of generational blessings.
2. He wants you focused. He sees the big dreams and visions that you have for yourself and believe it or not, God wants to help you accomplish those things. He loves you that much that He wants you single so that you can stay focus on your vision and accomplish your goals. Yes you can accomplish what you want out of life being in a relationship but it would take more time to get to the end goal.
3. He sees how desperate you are for a boyfriend or girlfriend. He sees how much you crave that male/female attention. You don’t realize that but those desires will destroy you completely if God allows you to be in a relationship. Those kinds of relationships will end before it even truly begins. Those kinds of desires are very surface level and only serves the flesh. God designed relationships to go beyond that and because He sees that you’re not ready for that kind of serious relationship, He keeps you single so that He can show you what a real relationship looks like. That relationship is the relationship you will develop with your Heavenly Father in your single state. You will learn how to navigate a healthy, successful relationship after you have learned with God.
4. Comparison!!!! You see everyone else getting that boyfriend/girlfriend, going out on dates, getting married, having children and here you are single as the day you were born. And still single for “x” amount of years. Because God knows your heart and sees that you’re not content within yourself, He withholds until you can learn how to stop looking at everyone else and look to Him to be happy, and to learn how to enjoy being by yourself. 
5.  Have you ever seen people struggle to find themselves once they get out of a relationship? It’s because for 1), they never saw themselves outside of a relationship. They never discovered their likes and dislikes. They never learned how to be independent. They had nothing going for themselves. Number 2) They didn’t know who they were before the relationship. God wants to teach you your identity. He wants you to learn your identity in Him so that you won’t be moved when someone does something to you or calls you something that doesn’t line up with who He has called you to be. A relationship should not break you but build you up. If you don’t know who you are, your spirit is open to all kinds of things.
6. God wants to do new things in your life that can only be done in a single state. He wants to birth new ideas and visions out of you. He wants to use you to let your light shine bright in this dark world. He wants to take you places. He wants to help you get out of your comfort zone and see life from a whole new perspective. if you were In a relationship, it would potentially distract you from what God wants to do in you and through your life. 
7. God wants you to learn how to fall in love with you and date yourself. You cannot expect someone to love you if you haven’t loved yourself first. You cannot expect someone to fall in love with you if you have not fallen in love with yourself first.
8. You’re not asking God to fill you up. He’s the only one that can truly give you what your heart desires. He’s the only one that can fill the void and lack. Getting into a relationship will NEVER fill that emptiness. 

Marriage is such a blessing but so is singleness. The next time you become sad over your singleness, instead of pouting, ask the Author who specifically designed your future WHY. After you do so, be patient. I believe that God will show you. I believe that one day, you will see the beauty of your singleness.

P.S. These were all of my WHYs lol. Why have I been single all of my life? For these 8 reasons. Comment below if your WHY lines up to any of the reasons I gave or if you have another perspective!

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