Why She Still May Be Single in 2024

When you have that intimate and personal relationship with God, you should know that your dating and relationship standards should not be according to the world but according to the Word. One thing that I continue to learn on my singleness journey is to never be afraid of singleness but rather, be afraid of wasting your time committing to a pointless relationship. Even developing a friendship with someone who you know likes you but is not what God has for you is time wasted. You want to be able to grow closer towards God and your goals as you matriculate in life. Anything less is a distraction. 

As we embark on the third month of this new year, I want to share some points on why you or even your girlfriend may still be single. Take a look:

1. She doesn’t have any good prospects at the moment and refuses to lower her standards just to be in a relationship.

• She desires strongly to be in a relationship but she is in no rush. She knows that it is better to spend those few nights crying because of loneliness than spend years healing because she acted on her loneliness. 
• She knows full well who she is in God. She is loved, worthy, and valuable. She walks with integrity and will not compromise to fit in or be liked. She is confident and will not wait on a man to live her life. She knows exactly what she brings to the table and is not afraid to eat alone.
• She finds beauty in her singleness and fulfills her time doing things she loves because she knows her singleness is only as good as she makes it.
• She knows that the man God has for her will not question her standards but rise up to meet them. 
• She doesn’t have time for the lies, manipulation, and games.

1. She believes that chivalry isn’t dead.

• She’s not into the scrolling and swiping left. She wants to meet the man organically. 
• She wants someone who will respect her and not see her as an object with lust in their eyes. Someone who will focus on her qualities and not her body. 
• Someone who will be willing to go the distance and involve her loved ones on the journey rather than keep their relationship a secret.
• Someone who believes in wise counsel as the relationship progresses. 
• Someone who is not into the whole social media life where they have to post their love because they want to keep things private and refuse to look for validation from the world.

1. She is growing in God and taking the time to heal before committing to a relationship.

• She knows that a relationship with God is most important. A man without God won’t know how to lead her the way she is supposed to be led in the Lord. A woman without God will fall for anything and won’t know how to submit herself to her husband. 
• She remains in God as she gets to know this guy or that guy, allowing God to show her who these men are before taking it a step further to even develop a friendship.
• She needed to surrender her life to the Lord and take a break from the dating scene so that God can heal her, show her what love is and what it looks like, and discover the person He made her to be.

1. She’s afraid.

• She’s been single for so long or maybe single her entire life.
• She’s been hurt deeply in the past or seen loved ones get hurt.
• She’s only been in situationships, flings, or short-term relationships, and nothing substantial ever came out of it.
• She is not ready to compromise or make sacrifices because a relationship is not about “I” but moreso “we”. 

1. She wants a man who will wholeheartedly pursue her.

• She hasn’t found that man who is willing to fully pursue her so she chooses to wait to be with someone who recognizes and loves who God made her and created her to be.
• She desires someone who is serious, with clearly intentions, and follows through. Someone who knows their purpose here on Earth and finds ways to incorporate their purpose with hers. 
• She wants someone who knows who they are so that they are confident in taking the leadership role, planning dates and keeping the spark alive. Someone who respects her boundaries, listens, and takes things into consideration. 

1. She’s trusting in God.

• She feels ready, has healed, has stepped away from the dating and relationship scene to pursue her yet she wonders when the wait will be over.
• She is learning that single women are just as valuable and loved as married woman
• The desire for marriage is there and she believes that God will fulfill it in due season. She does not have to go searching or put herself out there. As she continues to be about her business, surely the Lord will make it happen in His timing. She is not going to miss it because she has placed her heart in His hands. She knows that once she leaves it to God, she will eventually see God in it.
• She knows that God will not fail her in this area and even through the tears, she continues to trust in Him. She has experienced so many sad, disappointing, discouraging, overwhelming, stressful, and lonely moments around her singleness but she continues to keep her eyes on God.

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